The betterhelp website defines counselors as, “someone who gives advice, counseling, or therapy. A counselor can also be a mentor, somebody who supervises young children, a clinician, but most commonly means somebody who provides counselor behavioral health services in the form of talk therapy for a broad range of challenges. Counselor can also refer to guidance counselors, school psychologists, or school counselors, frequently seen in schools or academic settings”.
Additionally they state, “A professional therapist is someone who is licensed to practice psychotherapy and behavioral psychology techniques for individuals, couples, and families in crisis or seeking advice. Today’s therapists typically hold a Master’s in therapy, social science, or a higher degree related to social science.
Professional therapists are required to have a degree to provide general psychology and psychotherapy services. People visit professional therapists to receive counseling for a variety of personal reasons. Seeking abuse therapy for domestic abuse or speaking with an addiction therapist to create better outcomes for you and your family is nothing to be ashamed of.
Is a Counselor a Therapist or Vice Versa?
Therapist and counselor are sometimes used interchangeably but the licensing is different. You can also find specialized counseling for marriage and family, couples, addiction, PTSD, and many more. While therapists are considered counselors, they have a higher licensing thus not being just a counselor. A therapist might use the term counselor to describe their work.”
What I have learned from being a counselor is vast. I was such a young pup when I started. “Wet behind the ears” is what my dad would have called it.
I was unsure of my skills and techniques and always second guessed each session. I was worried I wasn’t giving the right kind of help to them.
I did home base counseling early on and remember calling my boss almost every night after my last client and would review my evenings sessions and what I did.
One night she did not answer my call and my drive home was quiet and strange for me.
In our next supervision session we addressed my need to have her validation every night. That I was beginning to depend on her helping me determine if I was doing everything okay or not. She set a boundary with me that I greatly needed.
I got the message and used the time driving home to listen to some good music and let go of any leftover feelings that might have stuck with me after a hard session. I saved my questions for our weekly processing meetings and began to develop my own sense of confidence in myself. It worked. It took some time and there were times where I messed up and moved past it.
What I’ve learned about kids and families in counseling cannot even be expressed if I wrote a million blogs. I’ve learned that most families are inherently good. That very few families intend for their children to experience any kind of harm whether it’s emotional or physical.
I’ve learned that the identified child, that’s in crisis, is more often than not expressing feelings for the whole family. That something is going wrong in the family unit and this child for whatever reason is the one that’s acting out to get the help. I’ve learned that angry kids aren’t angry, they’re sad and just haven’t learned how to express themselves in healthy ways.
I’ve learned to trust myself more, I’ve learned to trust the process of therapy, and I’ve learned to trust my clients.
I’ve learned that I am always going to be a student when it comes to working with children and families. They always have something to teach me. I know now that I need to be open to learning from them and willing to receive what they need to teach me.
I Need To “Practice What I Preach!”
As a counselor, I’m fulfilled by this work almost on a daily basis. The challenge of taking apart a problem and putting it back together in a way that is successful is fascinating to me. I don’t consider myself exceptionally bright per se. But I definitely am intuitive. My friends refer to me as an “empath” and it’s obvious in almost every facet of my career and life that I am.
Sometimes that takes its toll on me. I give to everyone all I have before myself. I have had to learn to say NO. I have had to learn to set boundaries. Which as you get older you seem to do naturally anyways. But, this work grounds me.
In my faith we are taught the basic tenants. Honor the Torah, (the Bible), do good deeds and practice love and kindness. Another tenant is Tikkun Olam, taking care of the world.
These principles have guided me through my life and my desire to do good for others. This includes community service, donating goods and services and time when I can.
It gives me the greatest intrinsic value when I am serving others.
I remember somebody telling me once in graduate school that “everybody should go to therapy at least once in their lives”. And I vehemently believe it. During the time of the pandemic every single person has had something changed in their lives.
Whether it’s something like the loss of a job, housing changes, shortages experienced in food and goods, or just the changes in your social situation. Everybody has been impacted. And everybody could benefit from talking to someone.
Each person could take a few minutes to identify someone in their family or somebody close to them that looks like they could benefit from counseling and have an honest open conversation with them. I think the world would be a happier place.
I know counselors all over the world are as happy as I am that recently the country set up a new suicide hotline number. That number is 988. You no longer have to remember the 1 800 number or go searching around to find it. You simply dial 3 digits.
Three digits that can mean the difference between life or death when you’re struggling with your emotions. If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health issues 988 can be the difference.